Graphic by Isabella Castillo

How to Have a Proper Anti-Valentine's Day

Written by Isabella Castillo Category: Culture Issue: February 2017

It’s that time of year: Valentine’s Day has come back to taunt the lonely once again. If you don’t have a significant other, don’t fret. You can chalk the entire “holiday” up to a capitalist marketing scheme deployed by greeting card manufacturers and chocolate vendors and blissfully (née bitterly) ignore it until February 15 rolls around, thanks to a cache of activities for members of the Lonely Hearts club happening around the Valley. We are lonely no more!

Our top 5 recommendations for a non-Valentine’s celebration:

Ladies’ Night
There is no better support system than a group of gal pals. Celebrate the Galentine’s way by catching a classic chick-flick at FilmBar’s 5:30 p.m. showing of “Breakfast at Tiffany’s.” As the its name implies, FilmBar also offers all the drinks you need to get somewhere between giggly-tipsy and cry-about-your-ex-drunk. Keep it classy, ladies.

815 N 2nd St., Phoenix

The Friend Zone
Japanese Friendship Garden
There could not be a more perfect place to spend time with a platonic companion than a friendship garden. Take this opportunity to turn off your phone (you don’t need to see all those sappy Instagram posts anyway), and bone up on your tranquility with a meditation walk through the Zen gardens. Admission is only $5, and the soft babble of the brook and whistle of the wind blowing through the trees is sure to soothe your angsty heart.

1125 N 3rd Ave., Phoenix

“Me” Time
New Serenity Spa
A wise person once said, “If you can’t love yourself, how the hell you gonna love someone else?” (“RuPaul’s Drag Race”). And if RuPaul taught us anything, it’s that sometimes you gotta treat yo-self to a luxurious facial and massage. Bonus! Gift cards are 10% off for Valentine’s Day. You’re worth it.

15609 N Hayden Road #138, Scottsdale

Mosh It Out
Club Red
Maybe you’ve recently been through the pits of breakup hell and are now in the “anger” stage. If so, throw all that pent up aggression into the pit, and mosh your heart out this Feb. 14 to heavy-metal artist Otep. So what if you picture your ex’s face and shove people a little harder than you mean to? What happens in the pit stays in the pit.

1306 W University Drive, Mesa

Man’s Best Friend
Cosmo Dog Park
When no one else is there for you, at least you still have your dog, and let’s face it, no one looks at you quite the way he does anyway. Take your furry friend on an adventure to one of the nation’s most highly ranked dog parks. Even if you don’t have a pup of your own, there’s a pretty good chance other people will let you pet theirs, and that’s not creepy at all.

2502 E Ray Road, Gilbert